Confidence is the strong
belief in something or someone, it’s the belief that you can do something or that you are something.
It is, in the most basic form, a belief system.
I recently read a post by writer Jeff Goins, he said that for years he wanted to be a writer but he never fully stepped into that calling until one day during an interview with Steven Pressfield, he had a moment of clarity. Steven helped him to see that what held him back was what he believed.
It has been said that if you think you can or think you can’t you’re right.
Confidence is a little like that; you often get what you believe when it comes to confidence.
The beautiful part is that when you learn where confidence comes from and how it grows you can cultivate it in your life and in your work.
Confidence is what happens when you understand and believe the truth about something. The truth that you believe may not always be obvious or even proven out yet, but, you still believe.
An Olympic winner has won the gold medal ten thousand times in the mind and heart before the day they actually have the coveted award placed around their neck. They know they are going to win! They believe it!
You can have the same type of confidence; however, it will involve doing a few things differently.
First, you have to understand that confidence is a belief system. If you believe that you will fail in your work or that no one likes you, you will help these events come to pass.
If you believe that you can’t learn a new skill, that you are too old, too young, too slow then you will assist these conditions and enable them to happen.
For years I struggled with the fear of speaking in front of people. That’s not an uncommon fear so I thought I would never get over it.
But one day, in about five minutes that fear broke and I’ve never had it again.
What was the beautiful truth that set me free from such deep insecurity?
It was a few things, the first one was a change in perspective. Instead of believing that people wanted to see me fail when I gave a presentation or preached a sermon, I believed that they wanted to see me succeed. That was a right and true belief.
Second, I prepared and practiced. Somehow I thought that great speakers just had natural talent, while some do, most dedicate time to practice and prepare. They know their material so well that it flows naturally from the heart as they speak.
Then, I gave myself a break and stopped being hard on myself. I used to be extremely critical of myself and took notice of my every weakness and flaw. I thought my weaknesses were somehow different than everyone else’s. I was wrong.
I had my areas of weakness and others did too. But, the most confident and successful people that I knew didn’t try to hide or mask their weaknesses; they saw them as a part of what made them special or unique. If you can do this, you will stop the tormenting critical inner voice that likes to point out how inadequate you are.
Confidence is beautiful and attractive. You will have more favor flow through your life, experience kinder and more loving relationships, and attract better opportunities when you are confident.
The same is true, except in the opposite with fear and insecurity. Those things will cause you to want to control people or situations, it will cause you to lash out or be unkind to others, and you will find yourself always comparing yourself to them. You won’t have the kind of work life you want or the depth of love that you desire.
It’s scary and hard to even think about saying the words even to your very best friend…”I’m not confident”. Especially if you’re a man and you’ve been taught to hide your feelings at all cost. I’m not letting women off the hook, because it’s hard for all of us to admit that were not the confident person we want to be and that our inside doubt can be overwhelming.
Every single person who learns to be truly confident learns to do so by changing what they believe.
They learn to accept who they are from the inside out. They take back their power and decided that the boss does not get to define them; neither can their families, friends or even a spouse.
No one gets to define you. Only you, along with your Creator can define who you are.
Here’s your take-away.
Confidence is about what you believe and you can grow in changing what you believe.
Confidence is beautiful, you have permission to be as confident as you want to be.
Confidence is contagious.
Confidence makes life more enjoyable and opens more doors and opportunities for you.
Finally, YOUR confidence is BEAUTIFUL, don’t water it down, spruce it up!